Feeling like I'm drowning
by The Silver Souls
Summary: Clarke and Lexa are best friends since childhood. Lexa hides that she likes girls, that she has feelings for her own best friend. They've planned summer vacations with a bunch of friends: they can't wait to go camping. A drinking game leads to skinny dipping and the night didn't turned out like Lexa planned to.
1. The feeling of drowning

Clarke and Lexa were happy: it was the summer holidays and they were about to go camping in the woods with a bunch of friends. Everything was prepared, packed into the car of Clarke's mother. The blonde girl supplied her mom about ten thousand times before Abby accepted to give her the car's key. They were lucky, because they would have needed to take the train or the bus. God knows the two of them didn't like public transportation.

"This is going to be awesome!" Yelled Clarke as she started the car.

"Just manage to get us there in one piece, please." Lexa said, glancing at her smiling best friend.

They've known each other since Clarke was nine years old and Lexa seven. They have been best friends since the blonde moved into Lexa's neighborhood. They went to the same school together, although Clarke was two years older than her. They had a complete different personality – while Clarke was the really social and party girl, the brunette was the calm and down-to-earth one. A lot of their friends were not understanding why they were friends and how the blonde had befriend someone as negative as her best friend.

Clarke was someone really special to Lexa. She was the only one able to get under her shell, to see who she really was. Since the brunette's parents died in a car accident when she was 14, she lived with a friend of them, Indra, and things were not really easy. She spent more time with Clarke's family and felt more accepted by them. She almost considered Jake and Abby like her own parents. And Clarke… it was complicated. They got closer in a way that made Lexa think about her true feelings towards the blonde. She was totally in love with her, but she didn't want to tell her or make any move. She could stand to have feelings for her friends and stay in the dark, but she would not be able to tell her and loose her. She was her best friend. Her life.

Two and a half hour later, after singing cheesy songs all along the car ride, they arrived to the camping site. It was deep in the woods and the closest village was 30 minutes from there. Some of their friends were already here. Well, they were more Clarke's friends than Lexa's, but she could stand most of them.

After saying hi to everybody, they unpacked their stuff and built up the tent. They were a fast team, so things were all set up before dark. A fire was lit and Jasper was already cooking hot-dogs. Things were good, they were finally allowed to have fun.

When all of their friends arrived, Lexa realised they were a big bunch of people. There was Clarke and her, along with Monty, Jasper, Finn, Raven, Wells, Costia, Anya, Lincoln, Maya and the Blake siblings, Bellamy and Octavia. They were 13 friends around a nice campfire, eating hot-dogs.

"Ok guys, it's the first day of summer, we must celebrate properly!" Said Jasper, holding a bottle of what may seem rum. He removed the cap and took a sip of it. He shook the bottle in the face of Octavia and she took it to imitate her friend.

Finn took out marshmallows and everyone got really excited. Bellamy gave beers to the one that wanted to drink along with him, which included all the boys and Anya. The night was just starting and the friends were having fun. Lexa was not really a party girl, but Clarke made sure to include her into conversations. She was really thankful of that, of course, because nobody wants to be left in the dark while everyone was having fun.

The blue sky turned dark and Lexa could finally admire the beauty of the night. Stars were showing and she smiled. Since they were in a big city, full of lights, she could not always see them, but it was different here. They were in the middle of nowhere and there was no light, except the fire in front of her. Lexa looked at Clarke for a moment. She was in an animated conversation with Octavia and Bellamy. The brunette smiled at the sight of her friend smiling and laughing. Her smile, the way she was looking at people, always looking for the best part of them, this is what made her fell for Clarke.

Jasper was getting tipsy and his friend Monty too. Those two were always funny together and were not missing a chance to make fun of people – except Lexa. They've tried many times but failed, so they were not trying again. They knew it wasn't worth it.

"Ladies and pals… We are reunited today to have fun and forget the horrible torture that is school. The planning for tonight is…" Jasper tapped his hands against his thighs to make a drum roll. "Drinking games! We don't have a good table to play beer pong, but I have brought card games. Also, there is a lake five minutes from here, absolutely made for skinny dipping!" He exclaimed himself, throwing his hands in the air.

While mostly everyone agreed with the planning, Lexa looked over Clarke with a desperate look. She was good with talking to people around the fire, but playing games with them always finished by someone in a pool of vomit – Jasper or Monty. This or it was getting sexual and she was not really into this kind of party. Clarke noticed her friend's look and sighed.

"Come on, Lexa. This can't be that bad..." She putted a hand on her friend's shoulder. "There, have a drink."

She gave a cup to Lexa's and she tasted it. It was filled with… something actually good. Sour, but it was drinkable. It looked like vodka and pineapple juice. She didn't questioned her friend more, as they were deciding what they were going to play.

"Oh, we could play King's cup!" Exclaimed Octavia, one of the Blake siblings.

"Nah, we always play that, O. And you're always the one choosing, too." Replied Raven. Those two were also best friends. Octavia crossed her arms to her chest and frowned. She was the youngest of their group of friends.

"Perhaps we could play truth or dare?" Proposed Monty with a smile on his face.

"Dude, remember what happened last time?" Asked Lincoln.

"Oh, yeah, whatever, not a good idea…" He replied to him. He didn't liked last time and everybody had a little laugh. Though, they agreed not talking about it.

"I would say Twister, but I haven't brought the game, my car was full." Explained Maya. Jasper smiled at her and kissed her cheek – those two were a cute couple. Lexa didn't understand how such a reserved girl like her could love a party boy like him. Things were weird, but everyone could say the same about Lexa and Clarke.

"Hum… We could play Never have I ever?" Proposed Clarke, looking at her friends with a daring smirk.

Oh no. Everyone quickly agreed to play this game, except from Lexa. This would mean drinking to everything she had done and… she was no slut, but there was thing even Clarke didn't know about her personal life. She looked at her best friend with a panicked look.

"Maybe I should –" She started, but got interrupted by the blonde: "No way, you're playing too!"

Since she finished her first drink, Clarke got up and made two more. One for herself and one for her best friend. Lexa was a bit frustrated, because Clarke was the only one able to know if she was lying or not.

"Ok! I'm starting." Finn said, thinking about what he was going to say. "Never have I ever… been sick because of alcohol!"

Most of them drank, except from Lexa and Lincoln. They were obviously the most responsible one of the bunch of friends. Clarke had been drunk a lot of time and Lexa was always there, waiting for her to get sober. She could say she was a really good friend.

Many rounds and it was finally Lexa's turn to propose something. She thought about it for three seconds and said: "Never have I ever cheated on a test."

She was not surprised to see everyone drink at this one, except her. She never cheated at school. She never needed it, she was good in every class. Clarke was the next one.

"Never have I ever been skinny dipping."

Of course most of them have been, but Lexa, of course, haven't. She didn't drink a sip from her drink yet, which was not really surprising. Clarke was looking at her to see if she was lying or not – Lexa knew it was the only reason she would be looking at her that way. Her best friend was already tipsy and the brunette wasn't even feeling the effects of alcohol on herself.

"Never have I ever slept with someone while drunk."

Nope, Lexa never done that. Clarke knew that already. She knew she had sex with her ex-boyfriend, but they split up after two or three weeks. It was nothing serious. She knew Clarke did, so she stared at her until her best friend drank, looking at her with 'I'm mad but not that mad' eyes. That made Lexa smile, showing her white and perfect teeth to their friends. They laughed at the scene, while Clarke lips were saying 'you will regret this'.

After many rounds, Jasper and Monty were already drunk. The two pals were obviously having fun, asking around if their friends never did this or that. Lexa had to drink to a few questions and the game was getting a bit more serious. People were asking more of the sexual life questions. Lexa was not really comfortable with that.

"Never have I ever kissed someone from the same gender when I was not drunk." Octavia smiled while saying that. She looked at Costia and, after, Lexa. She knew.

Clarke's eyes stared at her best friend. Lexa and Costia were the only one drinking to that question. She swallowed the alcohol and glanced at the blonde. She never knew Lexa had a thing with Costia, because she was afraid to talk her about that. That she liked girls. She saw the frustration into her best friend's face. Hopefully, she was not drunk enough to ask her in front of everyone, but she know she will confront her sooner or later. There was an awkward silence for a moment, but Wells interrupted it with another question.

It was getting late and nobody was really playing the game anymore. A few people evocated that they were supposed to go skinny dipping and it made some smile. Of course, the idea of getting naked and to swim with friends while in a forest full of bugs was really tempting, but not for Lexa. She never liked swimming, not since the car accident.

They got by the lake thirty minutes later: it took longer because of Monty always falling into roots and rocks. Maya had to guide her boyfriend and his best friend just in case one got himself injured. As everyone were getting their clothes off, Lexa sat on a rock. Clarke joined her and stared at her.

"I know, I should have told you." She said, knowing what she was going to ask. "I couldn't do it."

"Why?" She asked softly, sitting on the rock, getting closer to Lexa. Her heart skipped a beat, feeling Clarke's thighs against hers. She blushed, but her best friend couldn't see it because of the dark.

"I… I don't know. I guess I was scared of what you'd be thinking about me." She admitted, looking at their friends.

Clarke looked at her and made a little smile. "I would not have judged you, you know me. I'm your best friend, no matter what." She caressed Lexa's shoulder for a moment and said: "But I still want more that kiss…"

She shook her head and smile. "You know, last year, when we got into this bad fight… Well, I was close to Costia. She dropped hints here and there, I knew she was into girl and I was really mad about you. She inspired. "I needed to change my mind and went to see her. I kissed her and… we sort of dated for a short time. It didn't worked out, she said I was… whatever. I wasn't really into her."

Clarke laughed softly, nothing to make fun of her: "Oh, so that was why she looked pissed at you?!"

"Hmm… I guess so. I never thought she'd talk to Octavia about it." She mentioned, looking at their friends having fun, naked, in the lake. Clarke followed her gaze.

"Would you like to swim or…?" She asked.

"No. I'd like to go back to the tent. Can you come with me?"

Clarke looked at her friend with a smile. She was drunk, she knew it by the way she was talking, but she had her head on her shoulders and she knew it was better to go back and sleep. Lexa got up and walked close to the water, hands in her pockets.

"Hey hum… Clarke and I will head back to the camping site. Anyone wants to come with us?" Lexa asked to the bunch of people swimming in the water.

Finn got out of the water and Lexa turned her head. She didn't wanted to see Finn naked. She blushed again. While she thought that the man was about to get dress to head back to their camping site, he took her into his arms and smile. She knew what was going to happen.

"Finn... let me go!" She asked seriously.

He was drunk and there was no way he would have let her go like this. He started walking with Lexa still into his arms, fighting to escape him. She didn't wanted to go in the water. "Never." He said, with a big smile on his face.

Although she was kicking in the air in vain, she felt him dragged her in the water. Too far in the water. She panicked and screamed. "_STOP, FINN, GET ME OUT!_" Her body started shaking as she felt him let go of her. He entered in the water and suddenly, there was nothing Lexa could hold.

"Lexa!" Clarke screamed seeing her friend panicking in the water. She stood up and ran into the lake fully clothed. "Get her, she can't swim!"

Lincoln was the closest to Lexa, so he swam to her and grabbed her. As soon as Clarke arrived close to them, the brunette hung herself to her best friend. The blonde helped her to get out of the lake and looked back at their friends.

"We're leaving." She said with a serious face.

Lincoln followed them until they got to the camp, to make sure they were safe. Clarke guided Lexa to her tent, helping her to walk, her friend's arm around her shoulder. They entered the tent and Clarke started to remove the woman's wet clothes to get her into something dry. She noticed Lexa's eyes dripping tears.

"Shht, Lexa, you're ok. You're out of the water, you're good." She whispered to her ear. Lexa wasn't listening anything, she burst into tears, still not letting go of her best friend's body. She needed something to hold on to. "You're good, Lexa."

It was not Finn's fault, he didn't know. When Lexa's parents had their car accident, Lexa was with them in the back seat. A stupid drunken driver hit them on a bridge and their car got into the river below. The brunette's dad was probably already dead when they hit the water, but not her mom. Lexa almost drowned because she was unconscious until her mom opened her seatbelt to release her. Clarke remembered everything she said when she explained her, in tears, when she was at the hospital. Lexa never talked about it again, but the blonde knew she never wanted to go into a river or a lake ever. Lexa's last memory was her mom pushing her out of the water and never coming out.

Clarke had a hard time getting her totally undressed and putting on her pyjamas. She did it, talking to Lexa slowly, trying to be reassuring. Eventually, she stopped crying and shaking. "You are fine, Lexa." She said one more time, caressing her hair. She helped her to sit on the ground as she removed her own clothes to get in her sleeping clothes too. As soon as she sat on the ground, the brunette hugged her tightly.

"Thank you, Clarke."

Both stayed into this position until Lexa finally fell asleep. When Clarke knew she was sleeping well, she helped her laying on the ground and fell asleep too, her hand on Lexa's thigh.


	2. Awwww sorry, where you whining?

The morning after, Lexa slowly woke up. Her muscles were sore and she had a terrible headache from yesterday's drinking game, perhaps it could have been her panic attack. She felt Clarke sleeping on her back, her arms wrapped around the brunette's belly. In any other situation, she would have stayed in that position, appreciating this only moment when touching each other like that was normal. Clarke always spooned her while they were sleeping in the same bed. Lexa woke up, not moving fast, trying to not wake her best friend. She looked outside to found nobody, everyone was still sleeping tight. If she remembered right, she and Clarke were the first one to sleep.

The brunette put on her shoes and removed them immediately: they were completely wet from yesterday. She sighed and looked at herself: she was dry. She knew it meant Clarke removed all her clothes to put her into her pyjamas. Her best friend saw her naked and she couldn't remember it. This was not making her comfortable, but it wasn't the first time they saw each other naked. Lexa walked on her barefoot to the wooden table brought by one of their friends. There was many bottle of water on it and the woman took one. She must have been really thirsty because she drank all of it.

"Lexa." She heard her name and turned back, only to find Finn in sweatpants and hoodie. He had a really sad face. Lexa didn't speak, only looked at him with a tired face. She cried all night, it must have been normal. "I would like to apologize, I didn't know… I feel really bad."

"Save your apologies, Finn. I am not mad at you – you wanted to have fun and you didn't know." She said, taking another bottle of water. "We are here for a whole week, I would not like to ruin the mood."

She took the other bottle and drank half of it. He made a little smile, happy from Lexa's positive attitude. He never really saw her like that and he was happily surprised. "Ok then, if anything I could do though, let me know." He said, winking at her.

This guy was impossible. He made her have a panic attack and now he winked at her, like nothing? She felt frustrated by his attitude but didn't let it show. She could not let him ruin her week with Clarke, no. She sighed when she saw him walking towards his truck, leaving her in peace. At the same time, her best friend got out of their tent to join her at the wooden table. She grabbed a bottle of water too and drank a lot. She looked at Lexa and putted a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey you, are you ok?" She wondered, looking at Lexa's face to see if she really was.

"I've had better days, obviously." She nodded at her, the shadow of a smile on her lips. That was the girl Clarke knows. The blonde smiled and hugged her against her body.

"You scared me last night…" She started, backing off to look at her again.

"Was it before or after you undressed me?" She replied, her smile growing on her face. Clarke could only laugh if this kind of humour was from Lexa. She caressed her best friend's back and shook her head.

"You know what I mean." She sat down and drank a bit. "Pervert."

This made Lexa smile to her ears and Clarke was now happy. She liked seeing the brunette that way, smiling like everyone would do on a normal day. She always felt like it was an achievement to make her smile, but it was totally worth it. It was time to get back to reality, Clarke had so many questions for her, even though she didn't wanted to push her to talk. They were best friends, she thought she knew every of Lexa's secrets, but she was obviously wrong.

"But hey, you're not getting away with last night's conversation, you know. You need to give me more details." She supplied Lexa with puppy eyes.

"Oh," Lexa dropped. She really expected Clarke to not remember her telling that she kissed Costia. "Well, um… that happened. And there is not much more to talk about it, you know." She insisted, looking away to avoid Clarke's blue eyes.

"I know you're lying, Lexa. You always do that thing with your eyes." She specified to her best friend.

"That is not tr… ok, yes, maybe it is. But really, we kissed, she saw each other and that was it. No big deal. It just didn't worked out between us." She sighed. She was nervous about that conversation, knowing Clarke was the only one to be able to see right through her. "It was nothing really serious, I swear."

It couldn't stop Clarke from wanting more information about it. "So… you like girls, now?" She said with a little smile. She was just asking, Lexa knew it. "Have you been farther with her?"

Lexa took a sip of the water and had a hard time swallowing it. She didn't wanted to have this conversation and she was hoping someone could get out of a tent and talk to them, so the talk would wait – everyone except Costia. Clarke would be respectful but things would be awkward, especially after last night, while they were doing the drinking game.

"I don't know, Clarke, this is all… very confusing to me. And no, we haven't got there." She said, trying to have the most serious face. Lexa and Costia did more than only just kisses and she was feeling bad to keep it from Clarke, but she needed to. Her best friend saw everything clear in Lexa's game and she opened her eyes suddenly.

"You did!" She said with a smile, while Lexa frowned. "Lexa, how could you not tell me…?" She started but couldn't finish: the brunette splashed the rest of the bottle of water on her. Hopefully, it wasn't that much, Clarke wasn't soaked. The blonde looked at her as Lexa moved her hands in the air, like she did nothing.

"Whoops." She made and innocent smile. "You were saying?"

Clarke opened her mouth, staring at her best friend. A smile grew on her lips as she wiped her face with her hand. She came closer to her ear. "You slept with Costia." She whispered and laughed a bit. Hopefully, nobody could hear that, apart from Lexa.

"Hey girls! Everything fine?" Shouted Octavia as she got out of her tent with Raven following her. "Whoa, Clarke why are you…?"

"Long story Octavia." Clarke replied and Lexa smirked a bit. "Good morning to you two, beautiful ladies. Please, join us!" She said, watching the two best friends sitting at the other side of the table.

"I'm hungry" Dropped Raven, caressing her stomach. "Did you guys eat yet?"

"I am not hungry." Replied Lexa, looking at the two empty bottles she just drank in the past ten minutes. She would have to go about five times to get the water out of her system, she knew it. It was time for Costia to get out of her tent, joining them at the table. She felt Clarke looking at the other brunette and Lexa gave her a light tap on her thighs, letting her know it was time to quit it. Her best friend looked at her and sighed. Lexa knew all she wanted was details – all Lexa could remember, but she was way not ready for that.

The second day of their camping week was a good one. They made another fire and drank all day, singing songs and dancing to them. Lexa was having fun along with Clarke, who finally stopped from asking too many questions. The day was warm, the sun was hot, everyone quickly forgot about Lexa's reaction in the water. Things were good.

"I drank too much." Said Lexa, taking a hand to her forehead. She never drank that much before and she knew it had something about her conversation with Clarke this morning. She sighed, getting up slower than expected. Everything was blurry and walking was harder.

The next minute, she was on the ground, complaining about the fact that she should have stayed around the campfire. Walking wasn't a good idea and she should have waited a bit longer before getting up on her feet. She stayed on the ground a few minutes before Clarke noticed her best friend.

"Lexa?" She got up, everybody too much occupied with Jasper telling a story of when he was drunk, Monty on his side adding funny comments about it. Clarke walked to Lexa, who smiled and sat slowly.

"Look at you, you're bleeding." Added Clarke, looking at her scraped knees and hands. "How did you do that?" She said, helping to get her up.

"Walking is a lot harder when drunk, Clarke." She laughed a bit. "There was something on the ground, I stepped on it and fell."

"Mhhh… pretty sure you stepped on your own feet." She helped her walk towards their tent. "Come on, I'll clean that up and put you to bed." She added, pushing her slowly inside.

"Whoa, easy here, injured drunk girl!" Lexa complained, a little smirk on her face. She looked way happier than usual, alcohol had a good effect on her. Clarke noticed it and helped her to sit on her sleeping bag.

"How about you tell me more about Costia?" Clarke asked Lexa with a smile. The brunette shook her head and answered quickly.

"Nope. If you're trying to get more information while I'm not sober, this is not working, Griffin!"

"Aww come on Lexa, I'm your best friend! I deserve to know, don't you think?" She tried, looking at her with her usual puppy eyes.

"No." She continued.

"Don't you dare shut me out like that, you jerk." She said, looking in her bag for her medical stuff. As a medical student in university, Clarke always had her stuff with her in case someone got injured. She figured out it was a really good idea to bring some things, just in case. You know, drunk young adults alone in the woods, campfire, probably not the best combination. She glanced at Lexa, looking at her in the dark. She could easily define her face.

"Clarke, I…" She sighed. "There are rocks stuck in my skin, perhaps you could do a miracle and remove them?" It was her turn to do the puppy face.

"Not until you tell me more. You, girls, kissing, that kind of stuff." She dared.

"Fine, then." Lexa took a long breath and removed a rock from her hand. "I had a thing with Costia behind your back – yes, we did more than kissing. Also, I'm sorry. I like boys, but also like girls. Nobody really knows and I'm not ready to be out yet."

Clarke smiled and started to remove the rocks on her right knee, after she lit up a light. There was blood on Lexa's jeans and as soon as her best friend saw it, she looked away. There was two things Lexa couldn't stand: water and blood. "How did you find you were also into girls?" Clarke asked, taking Lexa's hand to do as well as her knee.

"Hmm… I don't know. Ouch, careful!" She shouted at Clarke. One rock got deep under the drunken girl's skin and the blonde girl had a hard time removing it.

"My bad, sorry. You know I drank too and if you keep moving, maybe I'll poke you in the eyes with that tweezer." She laughed at her. Lexa's laugh joined her. "Ok, now you should remove your jeans, so I can disinfect your wounds, Mrs. Lexa."

"Oh, right, my wounds." She lowered her hands and removed her jeans, looking Clarke right in the eyes. She was joking again when she said: "You pervert, always trying to get me undressed… twice in two days, you must be filled with joy."

Clarke stepped into Lexa's little game. "Shit, you saw my true intentions! Hopefully, this time, you're able to remove your pants on your own, less work for me!" She kept laughing at her friend, while disinfecting her wound. She applied a medical liquid and Lexa squirmed of pain.

"Dude, this hurts like hell." She complained with a grimace.

"Awwww sorry, where you whining?" Clarke joked, pinching her best friend's cheek like a grand-mother would have done to her children.

Lexa did a pouty face and said: "Enough with that, fix that damn knee, Griffin!"

That only made her best friend smile. She attacked the other knee, Lexa squirmed another time and shouted: "Why couldn't I fell on the damn grass again?" Clarke put a large Band-Aid on each of her knees and took care of her hands. She caught Lexa's attention, who was carefully looking at her doing her thing. She was staring at her best friend's face, inspecting every inch of skin. She was beautiful, even with the crappy light they had in the tent. Her eyes stopped on her lips and she fixed them while Clarke was checking on Lexa's last hand.

She took a long breath, her heartbeat rising and Clarke noticed her best friend staring at her face. She looked up, catching her green eyes and she smiled.

"Clarke I," She looked away and felt a weird sensation into her stomach. She was sure it wasn't butterflies due to the distance between her and her best friend. "I think I'm going to be…" She had the good reflex to put a hand on her mouth, get up and walked out the tent, even if her whole body was aching. The minute after, leaning on a tree, she violently threw up everything she had drunk and ate from the evening.

When she finally stopped, Clarke joined her to make a ponytail with her hair, so she didn't throw up into it if she needed to do it again. Lexa groaned to Clarke: "Could you please… take my tooth brush?" She looked at her and said: "My bag. The tent. Bring the tube of toothpaste."

If there was one thing she didn't like, it was throwing up. She hated being sick, even though she was feeling way better after all. Clarke got back with what she needed and Lexa must have brushed her teeth for around ten minutes to remove the taste of her own vomit.

"How are you feeling?" Clarke asked, when she got into the tent.

"Better now that my mouth is cleaned from that monstrous taste."

She clumsily got under her sleeping bag, trying not to step on her best friend in the meantime. At the minute she putted her head on her pillow, she felt Clarke getting her hands around her neck and she shivered. Her best friend was facing her and their heads were almost touching. Lexa had a hard time controlling her breath, because she knew the blonde wasn't sleeping yet. The brunette placed a hand on Clarke's hip, unintentionally pulling up her t-shirt. She felt her soft skin under her fingers and her mind was suddenly invaded by so many thoughts.

"Thank you, Clarke." She whispered to her friend, thinking that she would be asleep by now.

She was totally wrong, because the blonde was fully awake, her eyes open, waiting for Lexa to finally fall asleep. They both stared at each other in the dark and Lexa swallowed as Clarke moved her hands, playing slowly into her best friend's hair. The brunette stopped breathing for a second and closed her eyes. "You shouldn't do that…" She whispered again, biting her lips.

"Why not?" She asked her softly, while she kept caressing her hair. It was making Lexa crazy so feel her so close to her body, playing with her hair, her hands around her neck. Lexa's whole body was burning, fighting against her desire to get closer to her. The hand on Clarke's hip was warm and sweaty, eager to remove that shirt from her.

Lexa had a really hard time answering, her voice even sounded fake. "I want to sleep. I can't if you… do that, Clarke." Her best friend noticed it and frowned. She didn't stop, making the brunette shiver more. All she wanted was Clarke to keep playing in her hair, but she knew it wasn't helping her feeling towards her best friend.


	3. And it's killing me

Lexa was having a hard time thinking straight. Her body was against her best friend's, who she had massive feelings for. Her own hand was on Clarke's hip, while the blonde was caressing and playing with the brunette's hair, her arms around her neck. They were so close to each other, Lexa could feel the warm breath of Clarke. Her heart was racing in her chest and it was so loud the blonde could probably feel it. How did she ended up having feeling for her, anyway?

The younger woman told her she wanted to sleep, but that wasn't actually true. She wanted to stay there and stare at her beautiful face all night long, but since Clarke had her gaze over her, she forced herself to closer her eyes and forget her best friend's face was a few centimeters away from hers. The blonde said nothing and eventually, nobody could hear a sound on the camping site. Everyone was asleep, except from Lexa. She couldn't sleep, not with Clarke that close to her. She was struggling between staying there, enjoying this slow torture, or moving.

She held her breath and found a sleeping and smiling Clarke. She looked like an angel, like that. Lexa couldn't repressed a smile, seeing her like that. She had enough time to regulate her breathing and heartbeat. In the meantime, her hand moving a little more up, on her ribcage, under her t-shirt. Clarke would think it was only a sleeping Lexa moving her hand, unaware of her actions. Even though she was fully awake and her body wanted hers so, so badly.

She swallowed loudly and looked at her best friend, slowly opening an eye on her. Lexa thought, at first, she was dreaming of it. But then, she heard her voice, whispering slowly: "I can't sleep if you stare at me like that." Lexa would have sworn seeing a small smile on her lips. Her heart stopped again when they looked at each other for several seconds.

"I'm sorry I – I…" Lexa lost all her words when Clarke moved her head, so their foreheads could touch. Fuck. _Fuck_. She felt her friend's legs slipping beneath hers, lacing them together. She swallowed again. _Fuck_. "Clarke." She couldn't say anything else without stuttering. She kept looking at her with a serious face, unable to get herself together. Clarke's lips were at only few centimeters away from Lexa's and she was dying to break the space between them. She looked at her lips. No! She looked at her best friend's eyes, wide open, staring at her.

"What is it, Lexa?" She felt her hand slipping on her shoulder, stopping at her collar bone. She felt her fingers on her skin and she almost lost the last thought of sanity she had. She felt her move again, her body getting fully against hers and she didn't answered right away to her best friend's question. This was too much for her, way too much.

Her face was completely burning. She closed her eyes and felt her whole body shaking. Clarke noticed it and moved her head back a bit, still looking at Lexa's face. "Lexa?" She asked again in a whisper barely audible.

"Never mind, Clarke." She managed to say, with a weird voice. The blonde may have noticed it, but didn't reacted. She took her previous position, her forehead touching Lexa's. Her skin was burning.

"Tell me, Lexa."

She swallowed and the next thing she knew, she moved her head forward, reducing the space between Clarke's lips and hers. She slowly pressed her mouth on the blonde's, savouring the taste of her lips. She felt herself easily getting on the top of Clarke's body, her hands cupping her face while she slowly kissed her. She didn't know what she was thinking, but she was surprised when she felt Clarke's tongue pressing against her lips, eager to find Lexa's. She shivered, feeling her best friend's hands slipping under her t-shirt, caressing her lower belly.

Their kiss was swinging, but Lexa wanted more and she knew nothing would have really satisfied her. She bit her friend's lower lip, smirking at her and lowered a hand down Clarke's pyjama pants. She let her hand go under every layer of fabric and touched her nether region. She heard a distinctive moan and smiled.

Lexa felt someone shaking her shoulder from behind and she woke up to a worried Clarke. The brunette was laying on her side, drooling on her pillow. She looked at her best friend with a curious face until she spoke.

"You were moving too much you woke me up, sorry." She said. "I thought you were having a bad dream…"

On the other hand, her dream felt more real than it should have. Lexa got on her back to look at her friend and did a smile face to reassure her. She was still breathing fast. "Sorry." She said with the same weird voice she had in her dream. It made the blonde smile.

"Nah, it's good. At least I know you're not choking in a pool of vomit." She looked at her for a moment. "You're sure you're good?"

"Nope." She said, avoiding her gaze.

"Wanna talk about it?" She insisted.

"Not really, Clarke." She replied, looking at the top of the tent. It was still dark, so she knew she could sleep a bit more. But she also knew she couldn't sleep. Not with what her dreams were leading to.

"Hey weirdo, don't do that."

"What?" She looked at her with a concerned look. What was she meaning by that?

"You used to tell me whatever was on your mind, now you're shutting me out and I can't stand that, Lexa. I tell you everything and I thrust you, but…"

"I… No Clarke, I can't tell you something like that." She replied, turning her head. She didn't wanted to hurt her, but she needed to keep her true feelings from her. She was her best friend, the only one that knows how to deal with Lexa's shitty attitude, and the one that made her smile after all. They grew up together and Lexa couldn't sacrifice their friendship over feelings that might not be mutual.

"Why?" She frowned. "You don't trust me?"

Lexa sat up and looked at her friend, still having her worried face. "No, of course I trust you, Clarke."

"Then why don't you tell me what's on your mind?" She said with a sad face.

"I… could ruin our friendship." She dropped, looking a Clarke nervously.

"Try me, Lexa. Spit it out." She ordered to the brunette.

Lexa bit her lips, looking at Clarke. She didn't wanted to tell her, because she knew how complicated things could get if she said it to her. But the blonde was pretty serious about trust and here, Lexa knew she would get mad not getting answers from her best friend. So she said it.

"I have feelings for you and it's killing me."


	4. Things will be different

Her own words seemed like a nuclear bomb. She watched Clarke, seeing her finally understanding the real meaning of her best friend's words. She said it and Lexa was already regretting it. It was a mistake. Clarke pushed her, using her feelings against her, to know what was on the brunette's mind. Both were still staring at each other and Lexa would have like to bury her head into the ground, at least eight feet below. This was really embarrassing, but she couldn't and didn't know how to break the horrible silence.

Clarke finally spoke, avoiding Lexa's look. "I can see now why you didn't wanted to tell me about Costia." She sighed and she lied on her back. "You tried to get over me with her, didn't you?" She asked. Said like that, she sounded right, Lexa did slept with the girl after a fight with Clarke, but it wasn't really to get over her. She never wanted to do it, she just used Costia to… evacuate the frustration. She understood what was going on – Lexa never wanted a serious relationship with anybody. Costia was only to distract herself and both knew it.

"Something like that." Finally admitted Lexa. "Now she's getting some sort of revenge and Octavia might be helping her."

Clarke couldn't believe it. Lexa had feelings for her all this time and she wondered how she managed to hide everything from her. She was upset about it, yet she could understand how she felt. "Since how long have you…?"

"Long enough" She replied, biting her lips. "Please, tell me nothing will change between us – I never told you because I knew thing could get complicated and…" She looked at her with a desperate look, hiding her hands between her legs.

"You know I can't promise that…" She answered with a sad face.

"Clarke, I can't… I need you." She felt a tear dropping on her cheek, turning her head around to wipe it off. She didn't care about what Clarke could think of her in that moment: all she wanted to be was her friend. She wanted to be like before: Clarke the party girl and grumpy Lexa. She felt her best friend getting closer to her and hugging her. She knew Clarke wouldn't be able to stand, seeing the brunette crying without doing nothing. So she hugged her and passed a hand into her hair.

"I'm not going anywhere." She whispered. "Get some rest, Lexa. We'll talk about this another time."

Lexa nodded: she didn't wanted to ruin Clarke's vacation too. Like the day before, she fell asleep in her best friend's arms, crying.

Their third day was beautiful. Sunshine was already up high in the sky when Lexa got out the tent. Clarke was awake since a long time, the brunette knew it. She had a terrible hangover and a need for more than two bottle of water. After cleaning herself, she sat in front of Clarke at the wooden table. She started a conversation with the Blake siblings and Lexa didn't paid attention to it, since her mind was kept busy from Clarke's word from yesterday. She sighed, looking at the bowl of gruel in front of her: she didn't wanted to eat it, because from Clarke and her hangover.

In the middle of the day, Costia came to talk to her. Since everyone was busy with something and Lexa wasn't because she was feeling dizzy, it was a good time to talk about some stuff. Her first words were "I'm sorry Lexa, about Octavia…" Lexa only made a smile to her.

"I guess Clarke would have done the same thing to you, you know." She looked at her. She was a really pretty girl with long dark hair. Her skin was perfect and, for a moment, she wondered why she didn't fell in love with that woman. Things would have been easier, since she knew she had a chance with Costia. She wasted it on someone else instead.

"How are you? Did you get into a fight with her, because you usually follow her everywhere she goes?" She pointed a finger towards Clarke, still talking with Bellamy and Costia's friend, Octavia. Lexa felt a little pinch to her heart as she saw the blonde girl looking over her and looking back at the siblings.

"No, we only didn't agree on something." She simply answered and looked over the beautiful woman on her side. Costia smiled at her, in attempt to make her smile, but nothing. Lexa was keeping a neutral face, not showing her emotions, yet her friend knew something was not like usual.

"You wanna go for a walk?" She asked, looking at Lexa right into her eyes. The brunette nodded and they started walking into the woods. Farther they were from the camping site and Costia noticed Lexa was more relaxed. Something was obviously on her mind, but she didn't wanted to push her to know it. It was, after all, none of her business.

"So, what's up?" Costia said, trying to get her friend into a conversation.

"Got my knees scraped yesterday. I also threw up. And told Clarke I have feelings for her. Usual adventures of drunken Lexa." She replied with a bit of sarcasm into her tone. She saw Costia stop and glance at her. She suspected that Lexa was into Clarke the minute she saw them hanging out together. The blonde had such positives effects on her, it was almost impossible to not figure out that Lexa had feelings all along.

"Ouch. I take it she didn't reacted the way you expected her to."

"We still need to talk about this, she said." Lexa lifted her shoulders and looked at Costia. "I don't want to face her. I know things will be different."

"They will, perhaps in a way that could surprise you." The girl looked at her with her usual smile. It would have been ten thousand times easier to fall in love with this girl, but her heart had to choose her. Her best friend. She sighed and Costia added: "You can't escape this, you know."

"I know. I just don't want my heart torn into pieces. I know I will sound self centered, but I really think I don't deserve that." She said, looking on the ground.

"Nobody does." Costia took Lexa's face between her hands, as she caught the girl's surprised look. She leaned and kissed her once or twice, small kisses but very soft. She didn't pushed her to kiss her back, Lexa just did it without asking. Both knew it was probably not the answer to Lexa's problem, but they were young adults that could to everything whey whished.

"Costia, you know I love her – don't do something you'll regret." Lexa advised her between two kisses. Her hands got to the middle of the girl's back and the brunette pulled back to watch her.

"I can do whatever I want, I know the consequences and I am aware you are in love with her. If you don't want any of this, just stop, I am not forcing you to do anything." Costia said. Lexa backed her into the biggest and closest tree, finally a smile on her face. "There you are. I love when you smile like that."

Lexa didn't wanted to talk more – all she wanted was to forget Clarke for a moment and she knew Costia was able to give her that. She kissed her lips again and again, before letting her hand wandered on her inner thighs, slowly getting to her crotch. They were far enough from the camping site so they could see anyone coming towards them. "Lexa, just get it over with, please." Costia whispered into her ear, slightly aroused.

With a little smirk on her face, Lexa unbuttoned her friend's jeans and got a hand into it. Costia smiled when the brunette started rubbing and teasing her. Lexa already knew how to drive her crazy: after all, they had sex together more than once, they just kept their relationship – whatever kind of relationship it was – from people. She kept rubbing until Costia supplied her, and then she pushed two fingers inside of her, going inside and out of her and getting faster with time. She moaned from pleasure and Lexa kissed her, so she could stay quiet. The girl always had a hard time keeping her mouth shut, so the brunette had to deal with it in another way.

She made her come quickly, letting her groaning a little bit. Her body stopped shaking and she looked at Lexa with the same smirk she gave her previously. Costia had always been really kinky, but there was not really any time to waste. Sooner or later, someone would have noticed the girls were missing and maybe looked for her into the woods, where they were.

Costia unbuckled her belt and unzipped Lexa's pants quickly, getting her hand down under her panties, starting to give her the same treatment she gave to her friend. She felt a moan coming up her throat and repressed it. She felt a warm hand grabbing her breast and she felt weak, sensing Costia's finger inside her. It was so good, she didn't wanted her to stop. She kissed her and bit her lips, then kissed her jawline and her neck, going down on her collarbone. She had to admit it, Lexa was going crazy about her treatment. Then she heard it. Her name.

"Lexa?" Said the familiar voice. It was Clarke looking for her, yet Lexa did vanished only ten minutes ago with Costia. The brunette repressed an angry face when Costia removed her fingers from Lexa's pants, only to lick them and tempt her. It was working. "Lexa?"

Lexa kissed one last time Costia, zipped her pants and buckled her belt. She groaned in the process, as she heard her name for a third time. "What, Clarke?" She answered, almost yelling at her.

She found herself not far from them. Costia made a little smile and left her to Clarke. She leaned against the tree and sat down, as Clarke stopped in front of her. She noticed Costia leaving and glanced at her best friend. "Why did you left?" She asked.

"I went for a walk…" She answerer to Clarke's question, but another one came up that fast. "Yet you were not walking." She mentioned, looking at her.

"Yup. I needed a break."

"We should talk." Clarke dropped, still caught up into Lexa's eyes.

Since she couldn't finished what she had started with Costia, she was a bit mad. This interruption only made her frustrated more than she already was. She sighed and told Clarke: "Perhaps, not is not a good time."

"Why not? It's not like you were busy…" She started.

"I _was_, actually" She stared at Clarke and the blonde suddenly realized. Her mouth took a 'o' shape and she blushed a bit.

"Sorry, I thought… never mind." She added, standing up quickly. She looked at Lexa and left without saying anything more. Lexa was surprise, it was not her kind to leave like this. She would have normally talked her through or something alike. She frowned and thoughts invaded her mind. She already seen Clarke when she was jealous and this looked just like it.


	5. Call it jealousy or whatever

**Clarke's POV.**

I couldn't believe this was really happening. Last night, Lexa confessed her love to me and I had a hard time trying to sleep. I only closed my eyes because I was exhausted, but as soon as the daylight showed, I was outside. I never thought she could have feelings for me, never. She surprised me, because I thought it was something else on her mind, perhaps from their first day, at the lake. After all, Finn tried to have a little fun and threw Lexa into the water, not knowing that she couldn't swim and was afraid of water. My thoughts kept coming back at me every time I tried to change my mind, occupying my hands with something to do.

I was not feeling well and I knew it wasn't because I had a hangover – ok, maybe just a bit. But Lexa confessed her feelings, how the hell was I supposed to deal with that? All I ever wanted was my best friend, the grumpy Lexa I've always known, since my childhood. I took a deep breath, hearing someone coming behind. I doubted it was Lexa, she also had a rough night and she had been sick too. I turned my head to see Octavia smiling at me.

She looked like a ray of sunshine and I looked like a zombie. My hair was a total mess and I had circles below my eyes. How could she look like that after the night they had? She saw Bellamy getting out of his own tent to see he was looking perfect too. It must have been in the Blake's siblings genes.

"Hey O., you're up early!" I said, trying to brush off as many of Lexa's thoughts as I could. I smiled back to her as she joined me.

"Yeah, this heat is killing me. Is Lexa fine? I saw her falling into the gravel, she was pretty drunk last night." She said, looking at me.

"I think she's fine, but she will have a massive hangover today." I swallowed and added: "She threw up."

I saw Octavia's expression turned into a grimace, disgusted yet amused. "Yeah, that doesn't really surprise me. She drank way too much."

I nodded and the topic of the conversation changed, hopefully. I didn't really wanted to talk about my best friend, because I kept thinking about her confession, last night. I wanted to speak with her about it, yet I didn't wanted to insinuate anything or hurt her. I thought, for a moment, that this would not have happened if I didn't pushed her to tell me. She never wanted to confess, after all. It was my fault, not hers.

I saw her getting out of the tent and looking around her. Costia went to see her and they left for the woods. I frowned and knew I didn't wanted this girl around my best friend any longer, for some reasons. I had to finish my conversation with Jasper before getting into the woods looking for Lexa. I knew it was probably not a good idea to follow Costia and her, but I couldn't stay there and do absolutely nothing. I felt like I had to.

I shouted my best friend's name into the woods twice and I hat and answer. It seems like she was kind of frustrated about me yelling her name. Then, I saw Costia sneaking of behind a tree and she didn't look at me. I found my best friend on the ground, leaning against a tree. As soon as I asked her to have a talk, she told me this wasn't a good time for her. Then I said she didn't looked very busy and she answered that she was.

I clearly understood that. Why haven't I figured it out before? She was with Costia, apparently frustrated of something against me… My face changed as I realized what she was really meaning. She was getting over me with her, again. Did she had that bad habit to sleep with her every time they both got into a fight? I took a long breath and stared at her for a moment, my words stuck into my throat. I wanted to be pissed at her, but I couldn't. All this time, I was the one making her suffer, sleeping close to her, seeing her every day. This must have been harder than torture itself, because Lexa clearly told her that she never had the intention to confess.

I finally managed to let the words out. "Sorry, I thought… never mind." I said with a weird voice, getting up and leaving. What was I thinking, really? Following my best friend into the woods, while I knew she was with someone she already had sex with, to get over me?

I needed to go back to the camping site and forget about all this. I was walking fast, but Lexa was obviously running after me. She grabbed my shoulders and forced me to stop – it wasn't hard, she was taller and more athletic than I was. I frowned and faced her, trying to keep my emotions away from her.

"Sorry I was rough on you, Clarke." She said, looking at me with her big green eyes. I felt my face burn as I was blushing – why couldn't I keep a single emotion from her? Probably because I knew how to get to her heart too, so she could get into mine.

"No, I shouldn't have followed you here," I took another deep breath, still focusing on her green eyes. "I knew you didn't wanted to talk to me."

"I do want to talk to you, Clarke, it's just… I don't know what to say." She answered me, moving her shoulders. I saw her looking at my red cheeks and I turned my head, closing my eyes. I knew I didn't wanted her to talk, all I needed was her to be here with me.

I felt her hands cupping my face and I suddenly open my eyes. She got closer to me and my heart started racing in my chest like never before – I seriously thought, for a second, that I was doing a heart attack. My hands started shaking and I grabbed Lexa's t-shirt, holding it like it was a life buoy. I saw her getting closer to me, her face at a few centimeters from mine and I felt my body pushing against hers. I knew what was going to happen and I didn't know how to react to this. I wanted to push her back, but also wanted to have her in my arms. My pulse went crazy when her hand slipped to my neck and pulled me closer.

I slightly opened my mouth, as my lips touched hers. I felt her embrace, her hands started shaking against my skin as I kissed her back. My lips took her lower lip and slowly sucked it. I didn't know what I was doing with her. I didn't know what it was.

But it felt good and I never wanted it to stop. When she tried to pull back, my hands went to her neck to get her into kissing me again and again. I was holding my breath all along and I soon needed fresh air. My eyes caught hers and I saw a timid smile on Lexa's lips. She must have went way crazier than me. I heard her slowly whispering. "Clarke, what are you doing…?"

Her hands stopped shaking and mine too, and my eyes got down on her lips again. I craved to kiss them again and I did, I needed to do it. She was surprised about this situation, obviously. Who wouldn't? Lexa was a really good kisser and I could feel her not forcing me into anything. I was the one to initiate the kiss and I had no regrets about it. I felt her body contracting when I lowered my hands to her collarbone. She backed off and looked at me with a look I couldn't describe.

"Clarke?" She said, looking at me for a long moment. "I think you are not thinking straight."

I felt a laugh coming in my throat, but I only smiled at her words. No, I wasn't thinking straight. Everything about this situation wasn't straight. Lexa frowned and glanced at me. "I got really frustrated seeing you with her." I dropped, pulling myself closer to her again. "Call it jealousy or whatever…"

"You are jealous?" She answered, trying to cover the smile growing on her lips. I obviously noticed it.

"Yes, Lexa. But I don't know how I'm feeling besides that. Would you give me some time to think, perhaps we could talk when I am ready?"

I saw her nodding at my words and she kissed me another time, making my heart jump in my chest. I was a simple kiss, yet it meant a lot for me. I also had feelings for her, I knew it.


	6. When you get overprotective

Everything went back to normal after Lexa and Clarke's kiss into the woods. They didn't speak of it to any of their friends and promised to keep this between each other. Lexa felt a bit weird though, seeing Costia after coming back at the site. She had the feeling that she knew something happened right after leaving the brunette against the tree. Hopefully, she didn't mentioned it. They made out, like they usually did before, and that was all.

Lexa finally enjoyed her vacation with Clarke and their friends, but it was time to pack again and leave. They were out of beer and soon out of food. The best friends didn't talked about what happened in the woods, but they slightly got closer when they were alone – mostly in their tent. Nothing happened more than cuddling, but they were used to do it.

Back at Clarke's home after this pretty intense week, the blonde opened her front door and walked into her house, Lexa following her steps. After asking if someone was home, Clarke said that she forgot her mother should have been working. It was Saturday and she normally had twelve hours shifts. Lexa dropped her bags and walked into the kitchen.

"There is a note from your mom!" Lexa said. Clarke came by instantly and took the message from the table.

"Dear Clarke, I hope you had fun and relaxed a bit… blah, blah… I'm working a night's shift. There is money for pizza and I rented movies for the night," Lexa saw her smile as she continued to read out loud the note. "My car better have all the right pieces at the right place when I come home. Tell Lexa I say hi."

Lexa laughed and smile. Clarke looked at her: "Pizza and movie's night?"

"Why the hell not?" Lexa replied. It was late enough so Clarke could call the delivery guy. As soon as the pizza was ordered, she dragged the brunette into the living room to see what mover her mother had rent.

"Ok, I will let you choose which movie we watch first – The Hobbit or Paranormal Activity?" She asked with a smile.

"Griffin, you already know my answer. Plus, you know you won't be able to sleep if we watch a suspense and horror movie and you go right in your bed after." Lexa made fun of her.

"You're the one always sleeping when it comes to the best scenes of the movies, quit whining." She smiled back and put the CD into the Blu-ray DVD player. She opened her TV screen and flopped over the sofa, followed by the brunette. She took a blanket and covered both. This felt like old time for a quick moment.

The movie began and Clarke got closer to her, resting her head on her shoulder. Lexa didn't mind this proximity, it actually felt really good. A smile on her face, she couldn't give all her attention to the move: the blonde was shaking her legs when there was suspense music and she jumped every time there was something unexpected. She thought that it was really funny, because she knew how Clarke reacts to this kind of movie.

Clarke grabbed Lexa's hand, jumping of fear. The brunette tried to not burst into laughing, her laugh getting stuck in her throat. "You're good, here, Clarke?" Her best friend didn't answer and glanced at her. She never really liked horror movies, she always watched them because Lexa adored them. Just like Lexa never liked cheesy romance movies.

Both jumped when someone knocked on the door. It made Clarke happy to finally see Lexa jumping because she just got scared. She answered the door and paid the delivery guy with her mother's cash. She came back with a smile on her face and a pizza box in her hands.

"Finally, I'm hungry as hell." Lexa said, looking over Clarke who dropped the pizza box on the table in front of the couch. She went into the kitchen and came back with plates and towels. Their meal was delicious and they didn't had any problem eating that large pizza.

"I kinda was tired of eating hot-dogs all week, I have to admit." Clarke laughed as she ate the last remaining piece of pizza. That was it, the pizza was all gone. "I guess it's the worst part about camping, not being able to make a decent meal because there's no electricity."

"Well, I could say there's more… like, bugs, no showers, someone throwing you into a lake against your will. You know." Lexa answered, moving her shoulders.

"Did Finn talked to you about it?"

"Yeah, he came to me the morning after to apologize. You asked him to do it, don't you?"

"I was really mad at him."

"Clarke, you didn't had to force him to apologize to me."

"Well, I wanted to make sure he didn't do it again, I think." She replied.

"You're cute when you get overprotective."

"I was not overpr… ok, yes I was."

Lexa smiled at her and she smiled back. They continued watching the movie but Clarke's mind went drifting somewhere else. She was thinking about her best friend, standing her, close to her. Under the blanket, her hand reached Lexa's and she laced their fingers together. She really wanted to do that all the evening. She felt Lexa reaction: she took a long breath and sighed, tightening their fingers, her chest moving.

"Clarke, this is teasing me…" She softly said, turning her head to watch Clarke. The blonde was totally aware what she was doing to her friend and she wanted more. She had thought about it a long time: she knew their friendship was evolving into some sort of romance and she knew they couldn't fight it any longer.

"I know." She answered, getting her face closer to hers. Their lips almost touched and when she felt Lexa leaning, she got on top of her, sitting on her thighs. "I have been thinking a lot, Lexa." She took her face in her hands and smiled.

"Please, tell me this isn't a joke." She said, taking her hands around Clarke's waist. She swallowed as the blonde answered: "This isn't."


	7. You owe me dinner, beautiful

Lexa was feeling overwhelmed with joy, as Clarke was sitting on her thighs and telling her that she thought a lot about their relationship. This wasn't a joke. Lexa found herself repeating the blonde's words and she smiled. Clarke was thinking it was worth it to try and Lexa couldn't agree more, even if she knew it would be risking their friendship if this didn't work in the end.

Clarke smiled back to her and reduced the space between them, letting herself getting more intimate with Lexa. She wasn't scared of doing this, because she knew everything was going to be perfectly fine. She leaned and pressed her mouth on Lexa's, feeling the soft skin of the brunette. She was dying to feel her and she moaned when she kissed her back. Lexa's tongue licked Clarke's lip, begging to enter and twirl with the blonde's tongue.

The kiss was passionate and they felt themselves getting lost into it for a moment. Lexa was on her own personal could, thanking God about giving Clarke to her. She pulled back and looked at her for a moment, with a grin on her lips.

"You are beautiful, Clarke." She said, caressing her thighs. Of course, her mind was drifting somewhere else, but she wouldn't go there if Clarke wasn't ready to do so.

"Thank you." She answered to her best friend. "I can't believe you hid that from me for that long… that must have been torture."

"It was at some point, but hey… I got to cuddle here and there, so I wasn't going to complain." Lexa said with a smirk on her lips. It made Clarke chuckle.

"Yeah and you were probably fantasizing about me too…"

"I'd be lying if I tell you I wasn't."

Clarke kissed her again and Lexa could feel a certain desperation in the blonde's movements. She was getting closer, wrapping her hands around Lexa's neck and her breathing was getting faster. So was Lexa's.

Lexa huffed and separate their lips, only to move down to Clarke's jaw and neck, kissing slowly and often licking her skin. Clarke was shivering and holding to the collar of the brunette's shirt. In this moment, they knew they were both desperate for each other. Lexa's hand wandered from her thighs to her back and hesitated before firmly grabbing Clarke's ass. The blonde was surprised, but she was feeling so good she wouldn't mind that Lexa was trying to fasten things a bit.

"I want you so badly." She whispered to Clarke's ear. Lexa bit her lips when she felt the blonde's hands removing her top, letting her in a beautiful black bra. This was unexpected, she thought Clarke wanted to take her time to deal with everything in her head.

Clarke pushed Lexa so she could rest against the sofa, putting distance between them. Her best friend's fingers ran across her neck, to her breasts and finally her lower belly. Her touch was really soft, yet Lexa knew what she had in mind. "I can feel you worrying, Lexa." Her voice was suave. "I know what I'm doing."

Lexa was shivering to her touch. "You don't even know _what you're doing to_ _me_." She replied. Trying to talk while she needed to catch her breath was something really hard to do.

"Well… I'm about to find out." Lexa raised her eyebrows and she felt Clarke's hand adventuring slowly inside her underwear.

"Clarke, you…" She closed her eyes feeling the blonde's fingers touching her wet spot. She started to slowly rub her bundle of nerves and she was pleased to see Lexa's reaction. The brunette opened her mouth and started breathing faster.

"What?" She asked and Lexa's answer came right away: "Clarke, are you sure you…_ you… oh my god, Clarke_." The blonde started rubbing faster, her fingers applying more pressure and she knew she had find the right spot to make Lexa go totally crazy.

"You want to do th… this? Really?" Lexa muttered, trying to focus on something else than Clarke's finger about to make her come. She didn't want it to be so quick. She arched her back, getting closer to her best friend. "Clarke, you should… slow… down." She knew she wouldn't resist long enough if Clarke kept pacing her that fast.

But Clarke wanted to make her come. She wanted to feel how Lexa was desperate to come with her hands, how she needed it. She kept moving faster, the brunette couldn't resist to moan louder. "_I don't want to slow down, Lexa._" The way Clarke was saying her name like that, it meant a lot to Lexa. She wanted her. Everything. Her lips, her smiles, her hands on her body, everything.

"Clarke…" She whimpered, taking her arm to pull it out of her panties. She felt the relieving sensation of the orgasm gaining her and she felt her cheeks turning red, as Clarke was watching her come.

Lexa felt soft kisses in her neck and heard Clarke whispering in her ear. "I love it when you say my name like that, Lexa."

"Hmm…" The girl answered, pulling the blonde closer to her. "I can't wait to hear how you'll scream mine later."

"Scream? I sure am quieter than you…" She said, winking at Lexa.

"Want to bet on it?" Lexa dared her with a smile on her lips.

"Sure. If I am quieter than you, you'll have to pay dinner. In the other hand, if you make me scream… I'll pay you dinner."

"Sounds good." The brunette said, moving and pushing Clarke so she could be on her back on the sofa. Her mother would kill them if she heard they had sex on it, for sure. But the idea of doing something she shouldn't do was really appealing.

* * *

An hour later, Clarke and Lexa moved to Clarke's bedroom to continue to get to know each other more intimately. Both had undressed on their way to the room and they were now naked, Lexa between her best friend's legs. She was driving her crazy while sucking, liking and teasing her, while slipping two fingers inside her.

Lexa had more experience than her and Clarke knew it. She was thinking that her best friend would be good, but not that good. After all, she had sex with boys and they managed to make her come a lot, but Lexa had the right touch to make her feel on a cloud. She was trying to hold her moans and had a really hard time to do it. Had.

The brunette knew it wouldn't last long before she starts moaning. She was right, Clarke didn't repressed any sounds. "Lexa,_ keep going_." She slipped a hand into Lexa's hair and pushed on her head so the girl applied more pressure on her sex with her mouth. "_Oh my god._" Clarke came when her friend putted a third finger inside her and she moaned louder.

"You're so tight, Clarke…" She kept pacing her, but slowly, so Clarke could get her feet on Earth again. She eventually stopped and straddled her with a smile.

"You lost. You owe me dinner, beautiful." Lexa added and lean down to kiss her. Clarke didn't minded tasting her own essence. She wrapped her arms around the brunette's neck and smiled.

"I know… I knew I lost at the moment _you did that thing with your tongue._"


End file.
